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'There Is no Way to Peace; Peace Is the Way' - An Appeal to the Georgian Nation


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Reconciliation for Georgian-Abkhazian Families
Eka Mchedlidze, Tbilisi

Links are not always destroyed because of political problems and armed conflicts. There are still many kinks working Georgians and Abkhazians. There are many mixed families who were caught up in events that were out of their control in the early 90s. Such human resources are very important in restoring trust between parties to ethnic and political conflict. Rezo Bendeliani has been leading the Association of Georgian-Abkhazian Mixed Families for many years. The aim of the organization is to reunite families that have been torn apart because of the Abkhaz-Georgian war. The track record is impressive with 3,500 families being rejoined since 2003.

Family connections and how there are many extended families is the key ingredient in bringing them back together and picking up relationships that were broken off due to time and political events. The most difficult step is the first and this is especially true in starting the first stage of a renewed relationship.  Our respondent consider that economical relationships as being the priority in this field which is followed by cultural and educational activities. He also added that they have worked on the draft project on establishing educational courses of Abkhazian language. Bendeliani said that their aim was not just writing the project but it became very necessary for the people of mixed families who are still keeping in contact with their Abkhazian relatives.

-What motivated you to establish an NGO dealing with mixed families?

-It all started out with the problem of my sister’s family. She and her husband were married just before the war. My brother-in-law is Abkhazian. The war split them apart and it could have become a tragedy of our family if we had not supported each other. Since we lost Abkhazia I worked as the deputy head of Zugdidi Department for IDPs for a period of 7-8 years. Our department discussed the cases of nearly 120,000 IDPs. I witnessed many facts when a relative was looking for his/her missing relative for many years. Thus, we started thinking of drawing more attention to the issue. I involved the activities in 2000. The war separated not only married couples but mothers and their children, siblings, cousins and many other close relatives. I can assure you that reestablishing such relationships are important resources that can contribute to the reconciliation process the most. Nearly 41 % of the total population living in the region of Abkhazia had mixed families in before the war. We often encountered similar cases when a wife was Georgian and remained in Abkhazia with her husband, or just the opposite Abkhazian women followed their Georgian husbands back to Georgia proper.

The repatriation of Georgian-Abkhazian families continues to this time. Ruslan Kishmaria informs that 2 years ago 120 marriages of Georgian-Abkhazian couples were registered on the territory of Abkhazia. The Georgians who married people of Abkhaz ethnicity were mainly from Gali district or the Samegrelo region. This is the information which is not publicly available but does appear to be true, which is a positive tendency.  We know at this time that 42 000 Abkhazians live on the territory of Abkhazia and 60 % of them are of ethnic Georgian origin.

-The serous changes in solving the problem of Abkhazia have not been noticed yet. What do the NGOs do in this regard?

- The actual result of governmental policy is that neither the government nor NGOs have any contact with Sokhumi. Upon deploying Georgian troops in Kodori Gorge all what we had gain over the years had been lost. Contacts were broken at both the governmental and NGO level with counterparts in Abkhazia. However, the entrance of Georgian troop into the Kodori gorge did bring about a greater degree of stability to the locals. Many things changed for the better for locals and it should have always been that way. In spite of the gains on our side and for the locals the reaction by the Abkhazians was not well-received and they took the deployment badly.
 
Now the situation is a virtual stalemate. We have not had any serious contacts with those people we used to cooperate actively for one year now. The last project which was unable to finish because of blockade was called “Internet Dialogue”. The Georgian and Abkhazian organizations working in Tbilisi, Kutaisi, Zugdidi, Ochamchire, and Sokhumi were involved in this project. It was planned to involve the organizations from   Batumi and Gagra as well. The aim of the project was to help people in above-mentioned cities to find their relatives via internet and arrange their meetings at definite time and place. We managed to find 400 people in four months. Foreign donors saw the real results and it was the guarantee that the project would be successful. Unfortunately, the project has been stopped for one year now because of the standoff. Regardless, during this period, I did not give up hope and tried to reinstate relationships with Abkhazian organizations. In spite of numerous times, my efforts were not successful. It appears that the Abkhazian de-facto government was applying a great deal of pressure on such organizations and they were unable to continue cooperating.   It is the mandate of UN and other international organizations to do what they can to relax the tension and settle the situation between the sides. I have requested on many occasions for them to serve as a mediator. However, for reasons outside of my understanding the UN staff has not been very enthusiastic in supporting our efforts.

-How do you arrange contacts between relatives and then their subsequent meetings?  What preliminary procedures do you follow?

-First, the data base of those people who are targets of the project is established. Then the Ministry of Security provides them with passes that allows them to meet their relatives at preliminarily agreed time and place. The security guarantee is on the side which brings the relative. The number and role of the people participating in this process is strictly determined ahead of time. Nobody has right to take part in this activity without first have been granted with special permission. I must say that these meetings at Enguri Bridge very often start with the tears of happiness and ends up with the words of gratitude to us.  The meeting of two brothers was one of the most impressive. The brothers who have Georgian mother and Abkhazian father were separated during the war. Leila Basilaia from Martvili temporarily left her house in Gudauta with her elder son during a period when there was a truce. Her younger son remained with his father. Suddenly the roads were locked and the dogs of war unleashed again. Immediate family members lost contact. The father and the uncle of the children died in the hostilities. Years passed away… the elder brother was growing up in the family of mother’s relatives in Martvili; the younger lived with his Abkhazian grandparents. Both sides were eager to meet each other. We arranged the meeting of the brothers, the sons of Georgian mother and Abkhazian father, at the bridge of the Enguri River. It was terrible to see that brothers could not understand each other’s language.  However, now they live together and soon everything will be improved for the better.

-Has your organization arranged meetings with the representatives of the De-facto government?

-In Sokhumi, there is a Museum of Beria where UN office now works.  In 2004 the UN organized our meeting. Participants of the meeting were Abkhazian governmental and non-governmental organizations, as well as foreign organizations. In total, including representatives of the Georgian side, there were a total of 40 participants for this meeting. We discussed various events, what have been the results and future plans and direction for collaborating together. .

The relationship was really promising; the discussion was transpiring peacefully. We discussed common plans, however I should point out that we did not discuss politics, political mistakes and ambitions at all because these issues should be settled by more influential organizations. Our programs were directed towards organize seminars and activities that would benefit both sides, such as conflict resolution and cross cultural negotiations, human rights and many other related issues.  Local security department took part in our seminars and raised many polemic questions in finding out our political position. They were not successful in finding any faults from out side. Our mission is very concrete: working on restoration of family relationships and it does not have a political twist. .

-What would you say about the meeting you organized for the people with similar surnames? Reportedly seven people from Abkhazia attended the meeting…

-For the recent one year I can outline this event as one of the most important one. Seven representatives of the large extended family of the Bokhuas arrived from Abkhazia and they meet with Georgian Bokhuas. Similar relationships are working very successfully when political situation is not stirred in the country. Similar events can positively influence not only those participants who directly participated but also those who will hear about such events.

This program may have caused great degree of antagonism among those working in the Abkhazian security department. However, to not consider how some people feel about our work, we will not stop our efforts. Already we have gained the trust and love among Abkhazian people. A good example to illustrate is the fact that people often thought that organization was from Abkhazia and was created to deal with medical or some problems. We will betray our principles if are not able to provide some assistance. We should prove each other through kind deeds in demonstrating that we are friends and not enemies.  Take for example, not long ago we organized the transportation of a dead Abkhazian woman from Tbilisi to Abkhazia. Her last request before she died was to be buried in her native soil. Before death she urged us to bury her body in her homeland. The final words of Abkhazian people at the funeral were the following: We wish it were the final instance when dead body was transported in Abkhazia and rather that living people would be repatriated there ….

8 May. '08

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